John 13:35 CSB – “Jesus said, By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
1 John 4:20 CSB – If anyone says, “I love God,” and yet hates his brother or sister, he is a liar. For the person who does not love his brother or sister whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.
Proverbs 27:17 CSB – Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens another.
Acts 11:24-25 CSB – [Barnabas] he was a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith. And large numbers of people were added to the Lord. 25 Then he went to Tarsus to search for Saul,…
Paul & Barnabas’ Friendship – The Backstory
The nickname, “Barnabas” = “son of encouragement”
Acts 11:24-26 CSB – [Barnabas] he was a good man, full of the Holy Spirit and of faith. And large numbers of people were added to the Lord. 25 Then he went to Tarsus to search for Saul, and when he found him he brought him to Antioch. For a whole year they met with the church and taught large numbers. The disciples were first called Christians at Antioch.
1 Peter 5:6 CSB – Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you at the proper time,
A Sharp Disagreement Breaks Out
Acts 15:36-38 CSB – Paul said to Barnabas, “Let’s go back and visit the brothers and sisters in every town where we have preached the word of the Lord and see how they’re doing.” 37 Barnabas wanted to take along John who was called Mark. 38 But Paul insisted that they should not take along this man who had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not gone on with them to the work.
Acts 15:39-41 CSB – They had such a sharp disagreement that they parted company, and Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed off to Cyprus.
But Paul chose Silas and departed, after being commended by the brothers and sisters to the grace of the Lord. 41 He traveled through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches.
Lessons: How to Honor Jesus when Friends Disagree
- First, Conflict is Inevitable – Handle with Care!
Proverbs 27:17 CSB – Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens another.
Proverbs 15:2 CSB – The tongue of the wise makes knowledge attractive,
but the mouth of fools blurts out foolishness.
James 1:19 CSB – Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger
Proverbs 15:1-2 CSB – A gentle answer turns away anger,
but a harsh word stirs up wrath.
2 The tongue of the wise makes knowledge attractive,
but the mouth of fools blurts out foolishness.
Conflict is Inevitable. Division isn’t.
- Examine your motives
- Pray for wisdom
- Ask yourself, “where am I wrong?”
- Assess the seriousness of the problem
Proverbs 15:1-2 CSB – A gentle answer turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up wrath.
- Conflict is Dangerous – Proceed with caution
Four Ways to Escalate Conflict
- Impugn other’s motives.
- Tell people how they should feel
- Raise your voice!
- Focus on the past
Proverbs 15:1-2 CSB – A gentle answer turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up wrath.
Proverbs 18:19 CSB – An offended brother is harder to reach than a fortified city, and quarrels are like the bars of a fortress.
Remember King Pyrrhus!
Matthew 5:39 CBS – But I tell you, don’t resist an evildoer. On the contrary, if anyone slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.
- Most Conflicts Can be Resolved, if you follow Biblical wisdom
Romans 12:18 CSB – If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
First, Examine Yourself. Look in the Mirror.
Matthew 7:3,5 CSB – Jesus said Why do you look at the splinter in your brother’s eye but don’t notice the beam of wood in your own eye?
Hypocrite! First take the beam of wood out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the splinter out of your brother’s eye
Second, Run Toward the Serious Conflict, Not Away
Matthew 18:15 CSB – “If your brother sins against you, go tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won your brother.
- Accept Your Responsibility
- Watch Your Words
Proverbs 29:20 CSB – Do you see someone who speaks too soon?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.
1 Corinthians 13:5 says “love does not always demand its own way.”
Third, Some Conflicts Won’t Be Resolved Perfectly. Conclude Peaceably
Romans 12:18 CSB – If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Finally, Conflict Can Wound Deeply. Be Ready to Forgive
2 Timothy 4:9-11 CSB – Do your best to come to me quickly, 10 for Demas, because he loved this world, has deserted me
Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry.
Romans 12:18 CSB – If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Ephesians 4:32 CSB – be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.
